Being in a committed relationship is always challenging. However, for military couples, the pressure cooker of service life adds unique stressors that can strain even the strongest bond. While love and commitment are cornerstones of any marriage, understanding the reasons for MILITARY DIVORCES might give you valuable insight into preserving your relationship. By facing these difficulties head-on, military couples can proactively safeguard their bond. These top 10 reasons might give you a new perspective. The below mentioned reasons for Military Divorces are worth considering if you’re part of a military couple.
Are You A Cell Phone Addict? Cell Phone Addictions Breaking Up Marriages And What To Do Before It’s Too Late!
The 10 Leading Causes of Divorces in Military Relationships
1. Deployment Stress
Imagine months or even years separated from your partner, each facing your daily battles. The constant worry for their safety and the sheer loneliness of their absence take their toll. When the service member returns, readjusting to civilian life and integrating back into the family dynamic creates new challenges. Deployment is, without question, one of the top 10 reasons for military divorce. A 2017 study from the University of Minnesota examined just how difficult this period of readjustment is for service members and military families.
The research, focusing on the time following a deployment, highlighted the need for adequate support systems and resources to aid families in this transition. The study’s findings подчеркнули importance of addressing the emotional and psychological well-being of both the service member and their family throughout the deployment cycle.
2. Communication Breakdown
While deployments magnify the issue, communication breakdown is a silent relationship killer, even when couples are together. With its unpredictable schedules and relocations, military life can create hurdles for consistent, open, and meaningful conversations. With the demanding nature of service life, spouses often carry emotional burdens alone, creating resentment over time. This communication breakdown can lead to misunderstandings, hurt feelings, and a feeling of disconnect between partners.
3. Financial Stress
The financial instability often associated with military life adds fuel to the fire. Relocations may mean one spouse sacrifices their career, or frequent moves make building a stable income difficult. Juggling budgets and navigating unexpected expenses add pressure, putting strain on the relationship and contributing to the top 10 reasons for military divorce. The 2021 Survey of Military Spouses brought to light the significant financial hardships military families often encounter.
The survey found that many military spouses experience unemployment or underemployment due to the challenges of maintaining a career alongside frequent moves. This financial strain can lead to tension, arguments, and ultimately, contribute to the breakdown of a marriage.
4. Infidelity
Although trust is fundamental to any relationship, military life’s inherent separation can create opportunities for infidelity. It’s a tough reality for both the deployed service member and the spouse back home. Infidelity causes a breach of trust that can be near-impossible to repair.
Extended periods apart and the emotional vulnerability associated with deployment increase the risk. Both parties may seek comfort and connection outside the marriage, leading to actions they might not otherwise consider.
5. Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD)
The trauma that many service members experience while deployed casts a long shadow on their return. Living with PTSD can impact a person’s ability to regulate emotions, connect intimately, and maintain stable relationships. If left unaddressed, it places significant stress on the couple, pushing them toward separation. This invisible wound needs recognition and professional help.
Symptoms of PTSD, such as flashbacks, nightmares, anxiety, and emotional numbness, can create significant challenges in a marriage. The service member may struggle to reintegrate into family life, while their spouse may feel overwhelmed by the changes in their partner’s behavior and emotional state.
6. Differing Values and Goals
Entering military service often happens at a young age, and personal values and goals evolve as we mature. A couple who seemed perfectly aligned early on may find they’ve grown apart. This divergence creates conflict and can be difficult to reconcile without compromise and understanding.
Careers, family aspirations, and even fundamental life philosophies can shift over time. One partner might prioritize career advancement within the military, requiring frequent moves and deployments. At the same time, the other might long for stability, a home base, and the opportunity to establish roots. These conflicting desires can create tension and lead to feelings of resentment and dissatisfaction.
7. Frequent Relocations
Military couples know that frequent relocations come with the territory. But the constant upheaval disrupts more than just furniture arrangements. Moves mean leaving friends, jobs, and support networks. It’s no surprise that these recurring uprootings can wear on relationships and play a role in the top 10 reasons for military divorce. According to the United Service Organizations (USO), military families move an average of once every two to three years, a rate far surpassing civilian families.
This constant relocation can be particularly challenging for military spouses, who often have to put their own careers on hold or start over with each move. The lack of a stable career can lead to feelings of isolation, frustration, and a lack of personal fulfillment, all of which can strain the marriage.
8. Lack of Support Networks
Military families are often stationed far from extended family. Creating lasting friendships can feel futile when moves are frequent. It’s no wonder that this isolation leads many couples down the path to divorce. The lack of support networks for everyday challenges – child care, emotional support, even someone to lean on during tough times – puts enormous pressure on the couple to handle everything themselves.
Without the traditional support systems that many civilian couples rely on, military families often face increased stress and pressure. This lack of a safety net can make it difficult to cope with the added challenges of military life, increasing the risk of marital problems.
9. Difficulty Establishing a Civilian Career
The nomadic military life often impacts the non-military spouse’s ability to build a fulfilling civilian career. This career disruption affects not just financial stability but also personal identity and fulfillment. Frequent moves and location limitations make traditional employment tricky. Feeling unfulfilled or frustrated professionally impacts the dynamics of the relationship, becoming another of the top 10 reasons for military divorce.
Military spouses often find themselves making significant sacrifices to support their service member’s career. This can include putting their own education or career aspirations on hold, facing periods of unemployment, or accepting jobs below their skill level. Over time, these sacrifices can lead to feelings of resentment, inequality, and a sense of losing one’s own identity.
10. Substance Abuse
The stress and trauma associated with military life contribute to an increased risk of substance abuse. Relying on alcohol or drugs to cope with difficult emotions is a dangerous path for both the service member and their partner. If substance abuse takes hold, it damages trust, communication, and intimacy within the relationship, often leading to separation.
Substance abuse can exacerbate existing marital problems and create new ones. It can lead to financial difficulties, domestic violence, child neglect, and other serious issues. Addressing substance abuse is crucial for the well-being of both individuals involved and the health of the marriage. Seeking professional help and support is essential for overcoming addiction and rebuilding trust.